There’s a bluebird in my heart

Bluebird – Charles Bukowski

there’s a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I’m too tough for him,
I say, stay in there, I’m not going
to let anybody see
you.
there’s a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I pour whiskey on him and inhale
cigarette smoke
and the whores and the bartenders
and the grocery clerks
never know that
he’s
in there.

there’s a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I’m too tough for him,
I say,
stay down, do you want to mess
me up?
you want to screw up the
works?
you want to blow my book sales in
Europe?
there’s a bluebird in my heart that
wants to get out
but I’m too clever, I only let him out
at night sometimes
when everybody’s asleep.
I say, I know that you’re there,
so don’t be
sad.
then I put him back,
but he’s singing a little
in there, I haven’t quite let him
die
and we sleep together like
that
with our
secret pact
and it’s nice enough to
make a man
weep, but I don’t
weep, do
you?

“He’s also opened the door to receive more bags of dicks”

“Militia leader Ammon Bundy and his rightwing followers, who have been stationed at the headquarters of the Malheur national wildlife refuge since 2 January, have used Facebook, YouTube and live-stream videos to get their message out directly to the public and to call on anti-government activists to support their cause.”

Amongst the messages came a resquest. You can watch Cobert to get a better understanding:

It looks like the people have responded:

The Oregon militia’s bizarre PR tactics – from dildos to Facebook videos

After that reaction video came out people are reacting over Twitter in a way that makes me suspect that many more crazy deliveries will happen:

Twitter Live Search for Oregon Militia

You can also find more on the hashtags #YallQaeda and #VanillaISIS

I love the internet!

the-antlers-cover-familiars

Why’d you let me let you in when I was younger?

Intruders – The Antlers

Maybe when I’m older, I’ll be clearer,
more attuned and understanding.
Well, I’m ready.
I wrote a list of my demands and then I burned an older version.

So to start with, I’ll start over.
I’ll cut my hair and cut the power.
So who am I without weapons? Without defense to arm my guards against intruders?
Well this is my house, so fuck your doubts and your cute battalion,
‘cause I’m steady,
and when my double scales the wall, I’ll know exactly where he’s landing and I’ll surprise him.

Then when he’s captured, with his hands bound,
I beg for answers to all my questions, like,
“What happened?
Why’d you let me let you in when I was younger?
And why’d I need to?”

Facebook-for-Business1

Why nobody likes your Facebook Page

I see plenty of companies starting Facebook Pages and not knowing what to do with them. I think the main problem is with the lack of information on how Facebook treats pages (and profiles but that is a different story).

You just need to look at stats of Facebook Pages for October 2015 to understand what is going on:

  • Likes Growth: 0.20%
  • Post Reach: 7.25%
  • Engagement: 5.87%

resource-fb-oct-main.jpg

Meaning, during October of 2015 for a page with 1000 likes, only 2 new likes were obtained, each post only was viewed by 73 persons and from that 73 only 4 engaged with the post (like, comment, click).

So, if you post once a week on a page with 1000 likes, you can expect 16 people to engage with your posts.

Obviously this is an average and you can (and should) get better results if you post great content for your audience. But don’t expect miracles. Getting a Facebook Page to be a good return on investment (ROI) is hard work.

I like to listen and learn with Gary Vaynerchuk. I don’t agree with some things he says but I think is a smart guy. He famously asks: What is the ROI of your mother? and he has got a good point. You cannot know the ROI of a social media presence upfront. You need to invest, try, adapt, learn, see what works and your ROI.

So, let’s be real: most Facebook Pages suck and nobody REALLY likes them. Your page probably sucks too. How many pages on Facebook do you engage with? Your users are not so different from you.

If you have a Facebook Page or are thinking of creating one, there are only two ways to go about it:

  • do it casually (post once a week) and expect little from it
  • do it properly, invest daily into creating great content for your audience and test what works best (as a rule of thumb: videos have a higher reach, photos a higher engagement)

I believe that anything in between will be a waste of time and the ROI will be negative.

Curriculum Vitae

Personal Information
Name: Hugo Gameiro
Location: Marrazes, Portugal
Email: [email protected]
Sex: asexual male
Date of Birth: 07/07/1975

Work Experience
Fuck, I have done lots of crap for money. I washed dishes (I’m a decent dish washer if there is hot water, I refuse to wash dishes with cold water), waited tables, seated day after day on several offices pretending to work, dealt some dope but it never worked (never understood why I shouldn’t get high on my own supply) and started a couple of web startups but it turned out to be a lot of work and quickly got bored with it.

Education and Training
I hated school. I still believe that most forms of education are pointless but hey, what do I know!? So, I dropped out of high school (couldn’t be fucked to attend classes). After that I went to try college in London but the country wasn’t the problem. Same shit. So, my main training and education comes from music lyrics, movies, internet and the odd book. You can be pretty sure that I know things you would never expect (Yeezy taught me).

Personal Skills
Mother Tongue: Portuguese – My Portuguese is ok, not the best but who is? Really, tell me, I would like to know.
Other Languages: English – Do I understand Shakespeare, Scottish people or what goes around in the head of women, no! But I manage to communicate with most english speakers. You bet your ass (or arse, see what I did there, showing off my UK knowledge).
Communication Skills: I understand some pretty sick rap rhymes, I text (AF), I tweet, I talk on the phone, I speak to people on the street and even my family and friends. I also love to send memes as responses. I love memes.
Managerial Skills: I’m not really good at managing stuff. I love to have people do my job, does that count? But managing stuff like money, other peoples work and shit, is not my strong suit. Well, I spend more money than I make, that is a pretty awesome skill and is not easy to manage that, right?
Job-related Skills: What job? I don’t have a job in ages! I don’t want a job, hells no!
Computer Skills: Well, as girls are not interested in me, I pretty much spend my day on my computer, it’s A M A Z I N G! I know where to find really good porn, stream movies and series for free, download pirated software, you name it.
Other Skills: Telling others what to do, daydreaming… who cares, what’s the obsession with skills anyway?!
Driving License: Never got a DUI – winning

Additional Information
I’m not into sports, animals and all the healthy living kind of crap. I smoke like a pipe and spend most of my days on the couch.

Annexes
Can’t be fucked to link stuff.