Curriculum Vitae

Personal Information
Name: Hugo Gameiro
Location: Marrazes, Portugal
Email: [email protected]
Sex: asexual male
Date of Birth: 07/07/1975

Work Experience
Fuck, I have done lots of crap for money. I washed dishes (I’m a decent dish washer if there is hot water, I refuse to wash dishes with cold water), waited tables, seated day after day on several offices pretending to work, dealt some dope but it never worked (never understood why I shouldn’t get high on my own supply) and started a couple of web startups but it turned out to be a lot of work and quickly got bored with it.

Education and Training
I hated school. I still believe that most forms of education are pointless but hey, what do I know!? So, I dropped out of high school (couldn’t be fucked to attend classes). After that I went to try college in London but the country wasn’t the problem. Same shit. So, my main training and education comes from music lyrics, movies, internet and the odd book. You can be pretty sure that I know things you would never expect (Yeezy taught me).

Personal Skills
Mother Tongue: Portuguese – My Portuguese is ok, not the best but who is? Really, tell me, I would like to know.
Other Languages: English – Do I understand Shakespeare, Scottish people or what goes around in the head of women, no! But I manage to communicate with most english speakers. You bet your ass (or arse, see what I did there, showing off my UK knowledge).
Communication Skills: I understand some pretty sick rap rhymes, I text (AF), I tweet, I talk on the phone, I speak to people on the street and even my family and friends. I also love to send memes as responses. I love memes.
Managerial Skills: I’m not really good at managing stuff. I love to have people do my job, does that count? But managing stuff like money, other peoples work and shit, is not my strong suit. Well, I spend more money than I make, that is a pretty awesome skill and is not easy to manage that, right?
Job-related Skills: What job? I don’t have a job in ages! I don’t want a job, hells no!
Computer Skills: Well, as girls are not interested in me, I pretty much spend my day on my computer, it’s A M A Z I N G! I know where to find really good porn, stream movies and series for free, download pirated software, you name it.
Other Skills: Telling others what to do, daydreaming… who cares, what’s the obsession with skills anyway?!
Driving License: Never got a DUI – winning

Additional Information
I’m not into sports, animals and all the healthy living kind of crap. I smoke like a pipe and spend most of my days on the couch.

Annexes
Can’t be fucked to link stuff.